What are the reasons daughters in law should stop seeking approval?
Why should women even seek constant validation from their in-laws and society for the way they behave, speak, think, dress, and take forward their lives? Let’s get started with the graphic below –
11 Eye-Opening Reasons Daughters In Law Should Stop Seeking Approval From Society & In-Laws!
Here are 11 points capable of awakening the conditioned minds of the daughters in law and stop their approval-seeking behaviour.
| 1.
Why Lose Yourself Worrying What The In-Laws & Society Think Of You? When daughters in law start worrying what others think about them, they lose track of their lives. High time, you as a DIL turn prudent enough & have a grip over yourself. |
| 2.
Why Are You Giving Them The Power To Control You? DILS don’t realize the fact that by seeking to satisfy people around, they are passing on the control to the latter to use against them! High time you turn sensible enough to realize this. |
| 3.
Why Even Allow Your In-Laws & Society To Judge You? When DILS are seeking approval from people around, they are unknowingly giving the latter the right to judge them. |
| 4.
Why Compare Yourself To Your Fellow DILS & Feel Bad For Not Being That Perfect Daughter in Law? Approval seeking behaviour causes DILS to compare themselves with their fellow DILS. This will result in them feeling withdrawn. |
| 5.
Seeking Approval from In-Laws Thus, As a DIL, You Lose Your Confidence & Character. When DILS get compared or compare themselves with others, they will not only lose their confidence but also start developing bad characteristics. Would you like to encourage this? |
| 6.
Why Are You Failing To VALUE Yourself? Why don’t DILS understand that their approval-seeking behaviour indirectly paints the fact that they are not sure of themselves? What is the need for them to put themselves down? |
| 7.
Do You Even Remember You Have Got Something Called “Self-Respect?” What is the need for the daughters in law to seek external validation by staking their self-esteem? |
| 8.
Dear DIL, What Is The Need To Lose Your Individuality By Seeking External Validation? In the name of seeking approval, don’t daughters in law lose themselves? Don’t they give up on their originality? |
| 9.
Why Are You Not Being True To Yourself? Is it not important for the daughters in law to at least remain genuine to themselves? By trying to please others, don’t they turn disloyal to themselves? |
| 10.
Why Heed & Fight Back Against CRITICISMS THAT Should Not Matter to You? Whether people like them or not, why should daughters in law even give a heck about it? If people think bad about you, is that not their problem? What is the need for you to handle others’ thinking problems? |
| 11.
Why Should You Stake Your Mental Health When There Is Absolutely No Need For It? By overloading their mind with a galore of inhibitions about others’ expectations, daughters in law face the threat of mental exhaustion. Isn’t that bad? |
Read on as I have elaborated these points for you!
Why Lose CONTROL Over Yourself By Worrying Too Much About The In-Laws & Society?
Say a daughter in law has inhibitions pertaining to her mother in law; and she tries to do everything that her MIL would approve of.
In this case, Is not the DIL losing herself in the process?
When daughters in law start focusing more on what her in-laws think, they override their life , dreams and vision with their in-laws vision. Whatever they do, they end up trying to comply with their in-laws/ society’s views and lose control over their actions.
Why Let The In-Laws Take CONTROL Of You In The Name Of Seeking Approval?
It is important for daughters in law to set their boundaries with their in-laws and not provide them the scope to cross their limits.
Through their approval seeking behaviour, DILS not only put themselves down but also pass on the control to their in-laws to use to their advantage.
Why even provide such an opportunity to the in-laws to speak and act against them? Wouldn’t such things hamper an average DIL’s normal life?
Why Make an Effort Under the Context of Seeking Approval & Provide The In-Laws a WRONG SENSE OF ENTITLEMENT?
When daughters in law seek approval from their in-laws, they allow the latter to judge their actions and work.
Why entitle the in-laws to take control over them and provide them the ground / right to judge their daughters in law as they wish?
Why DILS unnecessarily become responsible for seeding such wrong behaviour patterns in their in-laws?
Why Compare Yourself To A Fellow DIL & Feel HAPLESS For Not Being The Perfect DIL?
When daughters in law seek external validation, they knowingly OR unknowingly start comparing themselves with others.
Say a daughter in law compares herself to her aunt’s DIL who has excellent cooking skills.
Whenever her in-laws appreciate the aunt’s DIL for her extraordinary cooking skills, this DIL will obviously feel affected because she is not as good at cooking.
Shouldn’t DILS accept themselves for what they are and stop feeling upset for not being the perfect DIL to their in-laws?
By Comparing/ Allowing Others To Compare You to Someone Else, You Develop 2 Negative Traits , INSECURITY & JEALOUSY
Consider you are an approval-seeking daughter-in-law and your father-in-law compares you with your neighbour who is also a daughter-in-law. Wouldn’t such a circumstance incite your envy towards your neighbour & also make you lose confidence over yourself?
My point is, When the daughters-in-law’s families compare them with others, it is imminent that the approval-seeking DILS will start losing their confidence.
Such instances that affect the DILS’ confidence will unknowingly make them more insecure and jealous of their fellow DILS. Do you even think it is desirable?
Do You Know That By Seeking Constant Consent From In-Laws You Fail To VALUE Yourself?
All human beings tend to make mistakes in their lives. Why then should daughters-in-law be scared of making mistakes?
Shouldn’t they realize that their mothers-in-law were inexperienced too when they were new daughters-in-law?
High time, DILS stop being over-critical of themselves and start respecting them for what they are.
That By Pleasing Others, You Sacrifice Your SELF-RESPECT?
Why don’t DILS believe in themselves? What is the need to seek external validation for their work?
That way, are they not staking their self-esteem and lowering their self-worth?
I read an article in womennow that talks about the importance of Self-Respect in relationships that makes my point more clear.
Here is a screenshot for your reference –
And Are You Ready To Lose Your INdividuality?!
Is it an unwritten rule for the daughters-in-law to keep striving for their in-laws’ approval & take a place in their hearts?
Should they spend their lifetime focusing on what their in-laws & society like and dislike?
Doing so don’t the daughters-in-law lose their originality in the process?
Dear Daughter-in-Law, Why Not Strive To Be True To Yourself Instead?
When daughters-in-law do not quit their approval seeking behaviour, they lose out on their LIFE PRINCIPLES.
Is it okay to compromise on one’s morals in the process of seeking approval from their in-laws & society?
Does that not mean they are doing a great disservice to themselves? Should not the daughters-in-law realise this?
Why Pay Heed And Fight Against Unnecessary CRITICISMS Coming Your Way?
Would the in-Laws & society stop cribbing over the DILS’ actions however obedient & perfect they are?
Then why should DILS even pay attention to criticisms coming from their end?
Instead why don’t daughters-in-law choose to be ASSERTIVE to shun away such insensible people?
The More Your Approval Seeking Behaviour, The Higher The Threat To Your MENTAL HEALTH!
By trying to reach the good books of their family members & society, daughters-in-law end up over-burdening themselves.
Focused on seeking external validation, they fail to look after themselves.
I strongly feel Self-Care and Self-Love is mandatory for all women. Do you still think women (through their pointless approval-seeking behaviour) should stake their sanity & miss living their lives? JUST THINK 🙂
There is ABSOLUTELY NO NEED for the daughters-in-law to seek validation from their in-laws OR society by giving up on themselves. Doing so, they would only end up committing a grave injustice to themselves. To sum it up, if you are a daughter-in-law, PLEASE PLEASE start Owning & Living your life.
If this blog felt empowering & rekindled your spirits, post your thoughts in the comments below. I would be happy to hear from you!